it was such a crazy week, and in many ways, i am quite thankful for the break this week. the week didnt turn out the way i hoped it would, but oh well, what matters i guess is how we fought it. there was the 'epic battle', so called not because of the prowess of both schools, but because everyone's hoping for the all-time biggest upset by the underdogs and hence 'doing the whole world a favour' - no doubt somewhat slumdog millionaire-ish. but the 'epic battle' between the 2 schools didnt have the surprise results or upset that everyone was hoping for, but i guess that's the way it is. to be in this field. someone has to lose each time, although i hope that at the end, there will be more wins than losses. well although my team did give ri a run for their money, and had high scories AND it was ri that kicked my team out, so there is some bittersweet in it. nevertheless, as a senior says it "it would have been great to kick your alma mater's ass from time to time".

then there was dcs, which was in some ways fun yet stressful. a learning experience of sorts, though sometimes the waiting times were hinging on the unbearable. nevertheless, debating competitively is always fun, especially with so many pro ppl out there waiting to kick your ass. i cant help but feel that i am stagnating though, that people around me are improving so much - even younger ones. and i am at the same level that i was a couple of years back. i mean rustiness as an excuse can be used for just that long, after some time you realise it isnt that you are rusty, it is that you neither have the diligence or the talent. but i guess it has always been established since my days in ri that i am a decent and mediocre debater, not a shining star, not indispensable.

so i am just hoping that i am a better coach than a debater, and regardless of what i can keep staying in this circuit for as long as i want, until i decide to stop.

junyi! posted at 11:51 pm.