Saying goodbye has never been easy. For the past four years, especially towards the end of 2003 and in 2004, I have put in so much to school activities, and somehow, it has all come to an end. Like Mrs Yau says, we attend our own graduation with mixed feelings. Cliché, but seriously true. Many (esp juniors) ask WHY, why the sense of disappointment and loss when most friends are all moving on to the same JC. I think the fundamental thing that we seriously will miss is the environment and friends made here. Friends who will somehow be lost when moving to a different school or faculty or lost because of a loss of contact due to an age difference (junior-senior). The teachers have also been wonderful and you may think they are people we can’t wait to get rid of. Then you are wrong. We really are so fortunate to get fantastic teachers and I really have no idea what to expect as I move on.

Somehow the past few days have come and went in like double-quick time. We saw the last periods we had with our teachers come and go, listened to them making final speeches and all, bringing back very, very fond memories. There was the numerous photo-taking as usual. And somehow the last few days were filled with feelings that I have never felt or comprehended before. I somehow feel that graduation has come too early and we just aren’t ready for it yet. Are we really ready for bigger things? Whatever it is, I do hope as we move on, those friendships made over the past four years – be it with the young ones or the compatriots will remain regardless of what.

We of course saw our graduation ceremony on a fine Saturday afternoon on 17 Oct (yesterday) In a ceremony that I would have felt really bored of if I wasn’t graduating, I realized it wasn’t that bad after all. I went early. Crapped around and took fotos wif nav, Kevin & zul. Then spoke to Shaun, helped ryan with the roses and gave the gifts to jonK & Ilman (seriously hope u guys liked it … I really ran out of ideas … and $ haha). Grad ceremony went OK … with thankfully no criticism about the video … haha … except some lamenting y they r not in it. Sorry … can’t find any video of u guys … and then there were the speeches from HM (found out he is leaving) and Mrs Koh (yay! She din cry!). If u were to ask me, the cert-giving was too long, but nevertheless, it was a moment of a life-time for many of us. Of course, the Raffles Can was so funky … it looked like it was the best thing the school ever gave us! The teachers sang a song, which was nice – in terms of the gesture and we of course sang the institution anthem for the last time this year. Went around getting signatures for my directory & took fotos … will upload them soon guys!

Ah sigh … the memories that came as we chit-chatted …

At this juncture, I think it is only apt for me to make special mention to certain ppl who have touched my life and made a difference to it, adding much colour and pictures to an otherwise blank page:
The teachers – Mrs Koh, Mr Wee, Mdm Ong, Mrs Ho, Mrs Neoh, Mrs Yau, Mrs Smith, Mrs Joycelene Lim, Ms Grace, Mrs Jasmine Chong, Ms Kelly, Mrs Ng Hoon2 who all will not be reading this but heck … are ppl who have shaped how I lived my life. They allowed me to develop and always gave me the opportunities to excel as a leader. Probably not many people know of this, but I did appeal to get into 9 subs when I was posted to 8 subs in sec 2. Ms Kelly & Mrs Ng were both extremely nice about it and pushed for me to get in. But I was rejected through this standard letter with just some half-hearted signature by HM without even explaining why … but hell … tt is for another time. Though the appeal failed, I would never forget this kind gesture on their part. Then there are my CCA teachers – Ms Grace, Mrs Chong, Mrs Smith, Mrs Neoh … who unlike certain people (shan’t give names) have always overlooked the fact that I am an 8-subber and gave me equal opportunities to serve the school. They might not have realized it, but I was always thankful for these chances to prove myself. Then all the subject teachers – for their dedication in providing the best education for us, thank you so much.

My own class of 4J. Somehow I feel really sorry that I failed to form really close bonds with most of you. And even if I did, it was mostly halfway through this year and probably quite late. Also, apologies that I did not commit as much as I could to class activities due to other commitments. Nevertheless, I would always remember u guys as a most fun-loving class and the times we had – the jokes, antics, pranks etc. would always remain etched in mind. Special thanks to Ben Ng & Phil Kwee for all the interesting moments and bonds formed. And as for JX, sorry for being a real bitch sometimes, u haf been a great assistant.

My former class of 2A & fellow Moorians. I somehow have had the chance of being monitor of both 2A & 4J, and somehow I have always had a strong sense of attachment to this class – probably coz of the bonds formed through the house activities and also I know u guys for 4 years and did not have many distractions while serving as monitor for u guys. I have enjoyed great friendships with many of you guys and I really wish you all the best – esp those in the moor comm – it was fun wasn’t it? Of course … thanks Ilman … you were my assistant in sec 2 and it got switched in sec 3 … Either way, it has always been fun working with you and I will always respect you for your leadership and charisma. As for Jonathan, I do think you are great and will never forget how we used to communicate … till the very last day over the railings and visit each other class till Saggy & other teachers were calling us from the same class etc. It was fun (sorry, my vocab quite limited) really! And the rest in comm. – Alan, Sam Jo, Ben Cai, JMP, Glen, Nash, Wen Jie, CCC etc. You guys have been great, strive on, & all the best for Os!

My fellow teammates & clubmates from Raffles Debaters – Suhas, Shang, Nav, Imran, Gautam, Ajit, Zul … I noe I did promise u guys a tribute and I will once Os is done. I thought since I am thanking every1 here I might as well add u guys in. U guys are a most fun batch of people to work with and I really wish you success in what you do. I often tell people how my life in RI really started after joining RD, and you guys really made my perspective of life in RI change. ROCK ON DUDES~

Those in NPCC ~ E5. Maybe it is quite sad that most memories shared are in NPCC and seldom outside. Maybe because we always had our circle of frens outside NP and have always failed to get together outside. Nevertheless, the fun we have from the power struggle (thinking back), camps, hikes etc. will be hard to forget, wouldn’t they?

And lastly, I always feel that this is the bunch of people that we tend to take for granted – and that is our juniors. My involvement in CCA & house have given me a lot of room to interact with juniors and they might not have realized it, they silently change the people on top. They impress you with how they work and how they always want the best. As you teach and train them, you learn as well. The friendships developed with them will prove to be priceless in the future (at least I think). But probably because of who I am – or who they are, working relationships developing into friendships are very rare. Nevertheless, I would just like to say to my debates juniors (Jing Song, Auyong) that of all my juniors, I would say I am the closest with you guys. Both of you, rock on (in both ur spotlight & debates), unite & strive on. Don’t let anything get into your way and stay united. As for Auyong, I hope you liked the gift ;P and at the same time, please don’t ever be too cocky for yours and the own club good. Those in Moor House (jerik, ky, shaun) – despite the fact that I think these guys dun come here, nevertheless, all the best, the future of moor lies in your hands. Be yourselves and never aspire to be us. You guys have been great leaders in your own right and I seriously believe you guys will all go far. It has been nice knowing you guys, but probably coz we haf always maintained a kind of professional gap between us, there was never much friendly kind of stuff between us. O well, all the best to you guys. The other bunch who dun come r those NP dudes – esp those in G1 during the leadership crap – Zeyan, Gerald, Jason, Teddy, Ky, Weijie etc. I really respect you guys for all your dedication to NP and making it better. That was something I couldn’t have ever done. Nonetheless, becoz I m not ur NCO and wasn’t able to know you guys well enough, I can’t comment much and wish you all the best. As for 1F, I dun noe how many of u guys actually come here, still, I haven’t met up with you guys for some time and will most prob will with hakeem & zul & co. some other time and quite soon. You guys r great, and remember, life in RI is NEVER EVER about study, mugging and memorizing. It’s about fun, cca & activities and some mugging, lah. So fight on guys, be it for your house (ahem), cca or raffles. The future of ri will soon lie in your hands b4 u noe it. O well, all you guys out there, b4 u guys noe it, you will be graduating as well, do strive on and cherish every single moment. Dun regret it only on graduation day.

I have basically almost thanked every1 I noe. How many dudes actually come read this blog, I don’t know. But still, for all the times we had together, it is worth penning such thoughts down. Then there are also the acquaintances … those ppl who we have met, talked but never to know each other better … for these ppl … any1 tt know me, I do sincerely wish u guys all the best, and maybe one day, we can get to know each other better.

As I stepped out of the gates of RI, I may no longer be a student here anymore … but I still keep in mind wat was said repeatedly at our 180th Founders’ Day Ceremony and reinforced by mrs koh in her speech … ‘Once a rafflesian, always a rafflesian.’ You may think I am writing crap, but here r juz my thoughts so far and if you think those I wrote r crap, then maybe I really m crap. I spent the past 3 days writing this, in bits in parts, during my leisure time and all. All too soon, Os will be coming, and until I have a compelling reason to blog, I would like to think this is my last entry before the Os. There r many other things I would have wanted to write. Stuff like lower sec life, rantings against certain inept organizations, cca life, various power struggles … But I guess, those would b left for other times, like when I have nothing better to do.

junyi! posted at 7:46 pm.